I want to set by example. I want to remain calm. But what does a person do when the fruit of their loins throws a Playmobile pirate, aimed at the face and yells “you are a stupid mama!”? I lost my temper and grabbed the Loin Fruit Gone Rotten by the waist and hauled him, kicking and screaming to his room in order to calm down enough to apply effective discipline, whatever the heck that means. Where does this pirate chucking come from? Kenneth and I don’t throw pirates, certainly not in front of the children.
I couldn’t really calm down. I was too worked up. The pirate was really the last straw in a series of child on mother terror tactics. He woke me up at 4:30, he asked for then refused to eat the eggs and toast I made, he pooped his pants, then ran away from me when I mentioned changing it thus spreading the offending substance around the insides of his jammies…I could go on, but I am getting angry again. When I am old and demented, I hope I need diapers.
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