And which ever jerk invented that sparkling dandruff of the devil! My neighbor and dear friend is an avid crafter. She is forever setting our daughters up with glorious glue and glitter projects. I really appreciate her love of crafting as she shares this trait with my sweet Lucy. Lucy loves making stuff out of stuff. Me, I don't make anything I can't eat. Well, there are some spates of knitting that go on around here, but if hard pressed, I will eat a mitten. Anyhooooo, a while ago Lucy was telling me how well she liked going to Rowan's house as her mother lets them "do the best stuff".
"We do fun stuff." I whined.
"We never do glitter." Then she gave me the stink eye. I do hope glaring becomes an Olympic sport before Lucy reaches adulthood. I would love to be able to claim that I raised a champion. I bought glitter, like a sucker from the Land of Stupid.
Things went well for the first couple of weeks. I kept it in a drawer next to the glue and scissors, just out of Tennessee's reach. Well guess who grew? Guess who decided to show me how much he had grown after waking up at 5 AM. Yes ladies and gentlemen, 5 o'clock in the Mother F&*%$#@^ morning. I was doing an admittedly poor job of supervising him. It is hard to do anything but a poor job of supervising when you are horizontal on the sofa under a blankie, trying to sip coffee without lifting your head. When I had finally consumed enough coffee to stand up and and fetch a second cup, I was greeted by two large piles made of the contents of six little jars of glitter. There was cussing and sweeping. After the sweeping, there was vacuuming. There are not enough glaring five year old's in the world to make me make that mistake again. The glitter will remain under lock and key until that little guy is old enough to do his own early morning vacuuming.
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